Wow.. here we go again. Another excited phone call from another friend who is moving in with their boyfriend. All I can say is.. That is so great! I'm so excited for you! And ask them all the questions I hope they will ask me whenever I find a man who wants to live with me as I sit in my parents basement unpacking my things.... Life is funny sometimes.

I've found it difficult to get out of bed today. My first day officially unemployed. I'm a hard worker. I've always had at least one job, sometimes two or three. This is uncharted territory. I think I am a great writer. I think I am an excellent employee. I just need somebody to see that. But how do I stand out in a pile of resumes? There must be something that other people are doing that I just don't know about yet. But what is it? And how long is it going to take me to figure it out?

I cashed my cheque from my internship today. $4000 richer... or $4000 less poor. Only $23,000 left to go before I'm broke. Sweet....

I have so many hopes and dreams but they all seem too far away. For the first time, I'm in this alone. I had my parents supporting me and pushing me to reach my goal of graduating University. I had Tom's support through grad school. Now I'm alone. My parents have cut me off, they have found jobs for my brothers and their girlfriends. They are generously allowing me to stay in their basement for a couple weeks. But the job search is up to me. The apartment search will be up to me. Paying off my debts is completely up to me. Drying my tears is up to me. I'm completely alone for the first time ever.

I kind of feel like I should be going out and partying. I feel like drinking. I feel like doing drugs. Maybe I've given up a little bit.. maybe I just need to numb the pain. I'm becoming depressed again. Anybody want to party?